Between university and connections, I have not had to apply for a job in over ten years and I’ve noticed a few changes in that time. There seems to be a soul destroying consensus amongst hiring companies to not reply to either your initial application to acknowledge you or to reply in a timely fashion after an interview. Not only is this incredibly rude, disrespectful and a tacky power play, but it cheapens the entire process for those who work hard to craft an application. Continue reading On Manners
Ok, so the title’s not great but it really succinctly conveys pressing and contemporary issues on the job-hunt front.
I have a question for every person out there in business land with an open position and a perceived shortage of applicant skill.* If I have done that job before, why would I want to do it again? Continue reading There’s No Skill Shortage, there’s a Good Employer Shortage
From the endless job ad clichés to the unnerving first interviews and then to the throw-up first day, I think the worst part of any job application is the sycophantic cover letter that has to accompany it:
Thank you for not writing your name on the job ad, thereby forcing me to begin this letter by jamming myself straight into it instead of being able to lube it a bit first. Continue reading Sample Cover Letter
Stories that begin with, “one time I…” usually end up being stinkers. One time I went to a job interview two hours away from where I lived. I took two buses and a train, then I walked about 2 kilometres down a highway to Shitsville, NSW for an interview with a company that was clearly going down the toilet. Continue reading You’re Gonna Go Far in Media, Kid
Ugh… This is everything.
If you’re old and lame like I am, unable to keep up with the doo-dads and whizz-bangs of today’s youth culture and can’t understand why anyone would listen to Ariana Grande by choice then please be upstanding for the first in a multi-part series to help you keep on top of all of these vital things so that you can communicate with your surly adolescent children and their haircuts. Join me in a round up of current cool shit, lame shit and other shit as we explore how far we can push a bad idea.
To accurately predict the next fad, I will input data from weekend brunch menus and hip hop lyrics into my state of the art supercomputer (my brain) and wait for it to fart out the next logical curiosity in:
I’d consider myself a pretty average Johnny, but like any other (relatively) young person looking for a job in the current market, I assume that I’m worth far more than I really am. So it’s no surprise that I am having trouble finding one because I’m not willing to settle for anything that I consider beneath me. I have decided by process of elimination that this excludes every job that ever existed except African dictator, extremely famous pop musician or lesbian porn film director. Continue reading Sympathy for the Lazy